Poetry by the Dead of Night

Water rushing down the river
Always moving, always flowing
Almost the same as it was a second ago.

It's never the same if you really think about it
How each second goes by and things never
are exactly the same as they were before.

You're sitting there, wishing for something better.
You're sitting there, wondering what's right.
You're sitting there, hoping it's worth it.

Our lives are made up of many different decisions
Some important, some not so much,
But every decision has its own impact on our life.

You are wishing for something better?
Go out and get it.
You'll never get anything better
by just sitting there.
The best things in life are fought for
and won.

You are wondering if it's right?
How do you feel about it?
Your gut feeling is usually right.
If it is in accordance
with God's commandments
and His revealed word
through his prophets
Then just do it.
Keep your heart open
and listen with your ears
for the Spirit will not let you
go far off track.

You are hoping it's worth it?
Well, you my dear, are worth it,
So make that decision count.
You are a valued Spirit child of God.
My associate, my friend
My sibling in spirit.

I'll always keep an eye out for you
I want you to be happy,
to have joy and prosperity in abundance
flow into, and through, your life.

You're sitting there, hoping for something better.
Go out and get it.
You're sitting there, wondering what's right.
Follow your Light of Christ, your conscious and guide

You're sitting there, hoping it's worth it.
You, my dear, are so very worth it.

So wear a smile and keep going.

Speed of Sound

Things rushin, things blurrin, things swirlin around
Trying to keep up with the times
Not the Jones, nor the Smiths
But with one's own expectations

You never let yourself take a break
One vacation, one breather, one moment
To take a breath, relax, and enjoy life

Things rushin, things blurrin, things swirlin around
Trying to keep up with the speed of sound
You're doin' great things
Wonderful, amazing things
But take it easy kid.

Didn't she teach you to stop and smell the roses?
Didn't she say the wonder of taking a step back and enjoying?
Didn't she help you understand that what's going on around us,
isn't necessarily as important as the big picture?

Too worried with what's right now
Too worried with what's next
Too worried about the past
Too worried about what others think

It's what He wills and wishes
And how our desires and delights can fit in His plans
As we do His will
Serve others
Bless others
Be happy

Most of all, just be happy.

Don't keep up with the speed of sound
You may be able to do a thousand things
But who, and what, is around you
Is the most important.
Don't drive them away
But take them towards Christ and Happiness.

Cold Western Front

Cold winds swirl around me as I stare into the reflection of the water next to me.

What is it that you need? What is it that you want? 

Just an hour and a half hour ago I felt sick to my stomach. Stress, anxiety, fear, worry. All feelings that surround my heart and soul. How long has it been since I've been able to have a peaceful night? How long has it been since I could just wake up and know it's going to be a good day? How long has it been since I've wanted to go to sleep, to enter the dreams upon which my nights thrive upon?

My roommate came with me and we went up to campus to seek refuge and solace near the element of Earth that we feel closet to; water. How much I miss the ocean, the waves beating upon the sand! The stream so close to my home that I can go and just listen to it trickle and sway beneath the warm summer moonlight. Even the pool is comforting and welcoming. I guess I feel like Percy Jackson in this sense that water is a comfort and a guide.

I could be pessimistic and I could be seeking attention. But I don't want that; I don't need that. I want to know who I am, what I stand for, and be able to do so confidently. Building myself back up, brick by brick, stone by stone, layer upon layer hasn't been easy. Who is Mike? What does he like to do? What are his aspirations and goals? Are they laden with reminiscing thoughts of what they could have been or what I wanted them to be? Am I letting past experiences dominate my future? Am I living in the past, trying to alter the present? I don't think so, but there's always an element that wants me to go back to when it was easy, when I knew what I was doing, when I was comfortable and safe. That time has past. I need to head out into the churning waters, leaving the port and harbor of comfort and make my way to the treasure troves of knowledge and experience that lie beyond the visible horizon.

And so I go. Defining myself by what I do, not what I say. God spoke that He looks upon the heart of a man (1 Samuel) to judge his true character. What is in my heart? What am I longing for? What am I doing to satisfy those needs? That's for me to find out and that's for me to answer.